'How Was Your Day?' Philosophy



On those days that I have no class, no groceries to shop, no effort to dress up and go out, I spend all day at home. I speak to no friends, I see no neighbours. Well then when I see some people, they ask:"What do you usually do in your free time?". Where should I begin? I just can't say that I stay home and do nothing. Because when I do nothing I do everything.



I think of my grandmothers, the one who gave me fruits when I said I needed to go home; and the one who said "I love zu" when I said I was going to sleep. I do research on coffee, the history of tea, and how to make nitro cold brew. I think about my dad and his dreams that he told me. Then I cry because I miss him so much. Now I can only meet him in my dreams. I watch a video of an ASMR cooking channel and think the world is interesting but so boring. I clean up the coffee mug that has been on my bed head for days. I look out to see what people are wearing - is it hot or is it cool. "Oh I saw this couple before", I think. Then I think about death, not suicidal thought, but just death. I'm curious to know what it feels like, but I'll just wait. I think of what I should cook for the following day. I get worried about my future - will I get a job? Will I be able to afford a car? Will I be able to have good coffee every morning? I do research on 'advertising jobs in Australia'. I am upset when I think about social issues and even more upset at people who have no social responsibilities. Thinking about myself, way too many responsibilities that I need to take. Then I make myself the third cup of coffee of the day. I am depressed about life for half an hour. I help myself to get out of the depression by decorating my own apartment in my head with those products that I saw in furniture stores and telling me that's one of the goals in life. Then I swear to myself for the very billionth time that I will never pick my nails again before putting a band-aid on a bleeding finger.

You see, my head is a universe. It consists of more than planets and asteroids than a regular solar system does. What I do in a day all happen in this universe - my head. On some days, there are solar eclipses, some lunar eclipses, and someday there are 'big bang explosions'. And when someone asks: "what do you do in your free time?" or "how was your day?", where should I begin?




10 comments:

  1. you're my favourite philosopher.

    xx

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  2. Beautiful blog post! Thanks for sharing. :)

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  3. These are all questions I ask myself! Loved this....

    xxAmanda
    http://www.poiseinwings.com/

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  4. Lovely post, well written!

    x
    StephC

    http://sstephcc.blogspot.com/

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  5. Such a great philosophy! Beautiful thoughtful words :)

    - www.youthofthesun.com

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  6. Sending you lots of hugs xD

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  7. In the pitcher, mix your semi-sweet wine, Grand Marnier (or other orange-flavoured liqueur), pomegranate juice, and orange juice. Then, put the pitcher into the fridge and let it chill, allowing the fruit and mint leaves to add more flavour. But, if you've already chilled both wines and the juices, and are in a rush, it can be served immediately as well! No matter which option you choose, it's best to mix in the sparkling wine when you're ready to serve the sangria, so it doesn't get flat! smart phones in pakistan

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  8. lol...this is so me. The number of things that can run through my mind in a minutem then i'm sad and then I'm okay.
    Wonder Cottage 

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  9. I love this post so so much <3 couldn't have put this feeling into better words myself.
    xx alexius.

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  10. Loving your style! You are so chic. Would you like to follow for follow on Bloglovin? :)

    Xx,

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